A series of synchronicities led me to Ritu Khoda and the work of Little Light. I browsed through a curriculum for children which was over and above the social-emotional learning curricula I had seen thus far. It is a spiritual curriculum, which guides children to acknowledge and recognize their own divinity, through stories and practices that encourage them to build self-awareness, identify areas for development  and talents, be empathetic and compassionate in their relationships with others and the planet.

A unique aspect of the Little Light process is that the teachers are fundamental as conduits to the children receiving the curriculum. Teachers actively participate in an intensive coaching training, where they learn how to adopt a coaching mindset. The outcomes of the coaching training are many: teachers learn how to be present and give their undivided attention to students and colleagues and to truly  listen. They learn how not only to accept but to celebrate differences, how to frequently acknowledge children’s strengths and contributions. Teachers who adopt a coaching approach can empower children to believe in their own resourcefulness and capacity to find their own solutions. They guide children to spiritual fortitude. The programme helps bring self compassion in schools.

I love Little Light’s approach; first the adults, and through the adults to the children. 

I strongly believe that learning how to coach reconnected me to myself. I took off the masks and costumes and conditioning that I had acquired while growing up. And I believe that it’s only when you have done this for yourself, can you do this for others. I wish that I had learned to live like this from a young age, to not be afraid of being myself, because of the pressures of others, society, and the need to ‘survive’ the rat race that is our current life.

I’m determined to share what I have learned with others who are or will face this. And even more determined that our children don’t get to a place where they have to unlearn so many things, and peel off their masks and costumes. I want children to be themselves, share themselves unabashedly, find their passions, follow their dreams, and share their unique contributions to the world. These are some of the reasons why I believe in coaching for children.

What is Coaching?

In recent years, the term, “coaching” has gained much popularity in mainstream culture. Prior to the 1990s, coaching was probably most associated with sports; for example, cricket and badminton coaches would help their clients become more effective and competitive players. In the 1990s, business and executive coaching gained momentum. In executive coaching, coaches work with clients to make them more effective in their workplace, often to build their capacity to grow into more senior leadership positions. 

Life coaching, a relatively modern form of coaching, became popular in the 1990s and more so in the 2000s. People engage in life coaching to make improvements in broad aspects of life such as careers, relationships and personal development. More specific areas could include improving self-awareness, developing self-compassion, creating self-discipline and motivation, gaining clarity, building relationship skills and developing leadership potential. Research has shown that coaching is beneficial and has clear impacts on the self-confidence, wellness and work performance of adults.

It is worthwhile to note that coaching is different from modes such as counseling, therapy and mentoring, primarily because it is based on forward action versus going into the past. Another significant difference in coaching is the relationship between the coach and the coachee. In a coaching relationship, the coach does not give advice to the coachee. Instead, a coach empowers their coachee to arrive at their own answers and solutions. We will explore further similarities and differences in a later article.

I Understand Coaching for Adults – but Why for Children?

Life coaching is not a term typically associated with children, and you may wonder why kids would even need life coaching. Believe it or not, children’s lives are complex and multilayered. Children also face a multitude of pressures such as parental expectations, peer pressure, academic standards or traumatic life experiences.

Apart from interacting with their families, children also navigate lives at school with peers, with friends in their building complexes, and even virtual friends they may meet on the internet and through gaming. 

Children’s belief systems are affected by their life experiences and socialization. Unfortunately, we have seen an increase in some of the negative impacts of these, namely fragile mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety and suicide. 

Life coaching is a wonderfully empowering way of guiding a child to not only build self-awareness and self-compassion, but also to recognize and acknowledge their innate strengths and talents. It can help children validate their uniqueness, build self-confidence and self-trust, and become really certain of who they are as individuals. 

Life coaching can support children to build healthy relationships, while retaining their identity and authenticity. It can also encourage them to maintain and nurture their relationships with peers and adults alike. 

Coaching can help children know how to face and navigate challenging situations by increasing their resilience and ability to problem-solve. Through an increased understanding of the core of who they are, and their ability to exert self-control, children are more likely to navigate life from a much more positive stance.

Why wouldn’t we want this for our children?

How does Coaching for Children work?

As a parent, you may be wondering how life coaching sessions for children work. Coaching sessions last about 30 – 40 minutes depending on the age of the child. It would be recommended that coaching sessions take place consistently (e.g. every week or every two weeks). A parent might have specific areas that they want the life coach to address, but it’s usually the child who determines the direction or topic for each life coaching session. Some of this depends on the child’s age, as well. 

In any case, the initial goal would be for the coach to develop rapport and trust with the child. These form the basis of a successful coaching relationship. From here, coaches work with children on developing their self-awareness as well as assisting them in navigating any kind of challenging situations they may be facing at the time

A coach always holds the best interest of the child at heart, and a core competency of coaching is to acknowledge the brilliance and uniqueness of each child. Coaching sessions are geared towards having a positive impact, and over time,  both the child and their family will notice the brighter inner light.

“Little Light is a beautiful journey. I enjoy every moment of the session. I have learned three important points to remember for a lifetime. Firstly I am a special being. I don’t care about the hurtful remarks of others because I am a special being. Secondly, whenever I doubt my potential, I take out my little self cheerleader to motivate myself. Thirdly, bad thoughts do not stay in my mind for long. I have learned a secret technique to shoo them away.” – These are the words of a young student Khwahish from The Millennium School, Amritsar. (TMS).

These powerful words from a young child are the reason we believe the Little Light School of Joy program must be taken to all schools. TMS Amritsar began its journey with Little Light in June 2021. Little Light programs are created as a long term engagement to encourage deep learning and lasting impact. Throughout the year, the educators took the children through the stories, discussions and daily practices. Soon the children began to learn sadhanas they can inculcate in their daily life to help them connect with their inner selves and develop spiritual fortitude.

What is spiritual fortitude ?

Walking on a spiritual path is taking a journey to understand the core of our being and also know that we are all part of something that is greater than us. There is a significant link between the understanding of our identity and the greater purpose of our life. This path helps us build resources and a capacity for authentic engagement with the world. Walking down this path, we gather resources that help sustain us as we journey through life.

Spiritual Fortitude is a measure of one’s ability to sustain an individual’s sense of self and purpose through their core beliefs, values and morals even in the face of challenging situations.

Why must we focus on building spiritual fortitude ?

Life is uncertain and as we go through life, we will certainly come across challenges and some of them may even feel overwhelming. It is then imperative that, early in life, we work on developing the fortitude to face these challenges with equanimity. Developing a powerful spiritual fortitude will keep us centered and anchored in our faith even when the waters around us are turbulent. It gives us the resilience to endure with that faith that this too shall pass.

How can we begin this journey for ourselves and our children ?

We all have within us this immense capacity to deal with life’s challenges. This capacity opens up to us as we begin to awaken to our authentic selves. The more time one spends in self-reflection and building self awareness, the more we begin to connect to our inner consciousness. We build a better understanding of who we truly are. This way we can begin to live a life in harmony with our authentic self.

Young children , unencumbered by life’s experiences and the biases that are built because of it, are said to be most in touch with their inner light. It is our jobs as adults to keep this light shining bright. We can do so by guiding them on a journey of self reflection and help them grow into confident, stable and happy individuals who are able to face the challenges thrown by life, instead of being overwhelmed by them.

The SCHOOL OF JOY program was created with the vision to awaken each child to their authentic self and find their inner joy. If you wish to begin this journey for your students, do check out the SCHOOL OF JOY program.

The ShriRam Millennium Schools (TSMS) hold dear to their heart the core values of Sensitivity, Integrity, Pursuit of Excellence and Pride in One’s Own Heritage. “When I first came across the Little Light School of Joy program, I was happy to see that the Little Light curriculum resonated well with our core values”, shared Ramanjit Nagi, principal at TSMS, Noida. “In different small ways, we have already been teaching children the importance of introspection and believing in the good within yourself. The Little Light books and activities connected very well with our philosophy and was a perfect addition to our curriculum making it much more organized”. The School of Joy program offered tools of self reflection for children.

The School of Joy program was implemented in TSMS Noida with over 24 teachers. Over a year through several hours of coaching, the teachers were taken through a journey of self reflection and self transformation. Mrs. Aparna Rawal, Grade 2 teacher from TSMS Noida shared with us how she was initially apprehensive about implementing such a program in the classroom with her tiny tots. But as she went through the coaching sessions, she gradually saw the difference in herself. “If it can bring a difference in me, then I too can be a motivator to bring a difference in others which in my case are the children in the classroom”, were the proud words of Mrs. Aparna.

The teachers have become more accepting of others’ perspectives. Ms. Ramanjit is happy that now most of the differences get resolved within the staff room and there are little to no conflicts broughts to her attention. The teachers have learnt new tools and strategies to resolve conflicts with more empathy. “I can be assertive and express my opinions while respecting others opinions too” says Mrs. Aparna. The coaching sessions created a safe space for the teachers to speak without fear of judgment. The process of being vulnerable and accepted by people around them has created a stronger bond between the teachers.

The stories in the books brought about so many complex topics in a beautifully illustrated form to the children. The questions after each chapter provide a space for introspection and discussion. It is amazing to see the kind of thinking such young children are capable of. “I have come to know more about the children through these programs as I am now observing and listening more. Children have now started talking about their feelings. Their vocabulary to express their emotions has also increased.” shares Mrs. Rawal.

The children love the meditation videos and ask for them to be used regularly. They even are asking the parents to join them in meditation practice. “We were fortunate”, says the principal, “that we started the School of Joy program during the pandemic. The parents too were able to witness and even participate in the program. We have had a lot of positive feedback from parents. The school of Joy program has a beautiful activity called “Windows to the Soul” in which we acknowledge the positive aspect and offer positive energy to each child. During one of the sessions, the teachers were surprised by the parents offering to conduct this activity for the teachers. It was a moment of joy”. Moments like this offer an opportunity for deepening connections between the school and families. 

The Little Light “School Of Joy” program offers such moments of joy spun together in a beautiful tapestry. It creates a safe space of joy for both the teacher and the child to learn and grow on their own paths of self discovery and transformation.

For Ramanjit Nagi, principal, The Shriram Millennium School (TSMS) Noida, the values of sensitivity and resilience are extremely important. These are some of the tenets that are followed rigorously across her school. And when she came across the Little Programme by the School of Joy, which drew upon positive psychology, spirituality and philosophy, Nagi felt an instant connection. “The programme resonated with the values of the school. It had a unique manner of inspiring the teachers and students to feel good about themselves, thereby bringing a positive change within them,” she says. When she went through the books and lesson plans, which were accompanied by engaging stories and yoga asanas, Nagi felt that the lessons contained within the programme would inspire the children.

The school embarked on this programme during the first phase of the pandemic. The timing became crucial as children were going through a rough time, coping with illness in the family, adjusting to a virtual way of learning, and physically distancing themselves from their friends. At such a time, this programme came through like a manna, helping children and adults feel good about themselves and content with the current circumstances. “In a very worldly way of living, there is no end to what you want to acquire or achieve. But once you are at peace, the path ahead becomes clear,” elaborates Nagi. With the programme, even six-year-olds have been able to introspect and develop their self awareness.

The benefits of developing self reflection and self awareness for students are many. According to an article by the Berkeley Wellbeing Institute, an introspective person is someone who regularly looks inward to try to understand their mind, thoughts, feelings, and inner workings. “They might engage in meditation or other contemplative practices. Or, they might just pause to self-reflect when something is bothering them, when they handled a situation poorly, or when they are just curious to learn more about themselves. “What was really going on?” they might ask themselves,” states the article, “We probably all do this to varying degrees. Deeper or more frequent introspection can help us gain clarity that helps us move forward and live our lives more effectively.”

Nagi has already seen the process of introspection help the children in her school. They are able to handle adversities in a better manner. The discussions after each lesson, given in the Little Light programme, often elicits beautiful answers about looking at the positives in life. “They are also able to handle the negative in a more positive manner. This learning is important not just during the pandemic but otherwise as well,” she says.

The programme has led to a personal transformation within the teachers as well. Practising self discovery for kids helps build awareness. It has also taught them to accept situations gracefully and how to move on from there. Once they know they are on the right path, the teachers are empowered with confidence in their ability to sort things out.“They know that they will sail through, come what may,” explains Nagi. The focus is on authenticity and being real. An article on the Elmhurst University website about powerful teaching strategies for connecting with students highlights the importance of this aspect. ““Being real” means sharing vulnerabilities and the challenges of learning and teaching. Teachers must show they are always learning, which means making mistakes, asking for help, and having to back up or even start over,” it states. And the teachers at TSMS Noida are doing exactly that.

The school has received heartening feedback from the parents as well. Since the programme started during the pandemic, when the entire learning was online, families got involved in the process as well. The parents understood how the programme led to positive transformation. They could see children in the peer group appreciating one another. “So, the parents decided to do this process of acknowledgement for the teachers. To see the teachers, parents and children experience the programme has been a beautiful experience,” says Nagi.

Within the classroom, the programme has resulted in mindful teaching. Empathy now flows naturally between the Little Light coaches and the teachers, which then results in a far more empathetic engagement with the students. “The way of living and working has gotten streamlined,” she adds.